Desperate Housewives

Good morning everyone!! Before I get back to recaps of the series, I’d like to take a minute to put the spotlight on one of my favorite neighbors, Karen Cluskey and the woman who plays her. She’s been there pretty much from the beginning and has slowly taken on a more prominent role. Once no more than a cranky neighbor that Lynette hated, she’s now her babysitter and a good friend to her and the Scavo family.

One of the best things to me about the character is the fact she’s a straight-shooter. She says exactly what’s on her mind and isn’t afraid of anyone. From defending the Scavo kids from a “kidnapper” to helping Lynette scatter Ida Greenberg’s ashes, she has some of the cooler scenes of the neighbors. While she is a bit of a “hard” type, she has shown quite a few times over the years that she’s also got a vulnerable and human side. One of those moments was when she begged Lynette to come with her because she was scared to go to the hospital alone. Another was when she revealed to the Scavo kids her son had died at a very young age. You could see the sadness and a longing for the past in her eyes during that one, even though she tried not to show anything.

One of her odder moments came in Season 3. It was during the episodes “Liaisons” and “God, that’s Good”. In these episodes, Ida Greenberg and Parker Scavo find the dead body of her husband in the freezer. Turns out, she came home one day several years ago to find he had passed suddenly. Scared of losing her home and everything she’s got after finding out his first wife would get his pension, she hides his body so the company thinks he’s alive and she can keep collecting the checks. Talk about desperation!

As for the woman who plays her, Kathryn Joosten herself seems like quite the lady. Once a psychiatric nurse, she later married and had two children. Sadly, they ended up divorcing due to her husband’s drinking problem and Kathryn had to figure out what to do with herself. She took a chance of rekindling her childhood love of acting during her 40s and the rest is history. She has guested on many series, including Buffy, the X-Files and Joan of Arcadia. She is also a lung cancer survivor and has won an Emmy for her part on Housewives. Given all this, I think it’s safe to say she’s just as spunky and determined as the character she plays. Now that they’re shooting again, it shouldn’t be long before all you spoiler readers out there find out what happened to her character. Me? I think I’ll just wait and be surprised.

Well, I’m out of here for now… stay tuned for those recaps I’ll be starting up again tomorrow. I leave you guys with some great McCluskey quotes. Enjoy!!

Lynette: “Are you sure you didn’t misplace it? No offense, but you’re getting up there in the years.”
Mrs. McCluskey: “No offense, but you should be sterilised.”

Lynette: “Let me tell you something. Half of life is obligations. You don’t want to go to your husband’s company Christmas party, but you do. You don’t want to sell candy so your kid’s band can buy piccolos, but you do it. You attend your third cousin’s wedding. You pick up the dry cleaning. That’s life. It’s obligations. And you are now my obligation, so tomorrow morning, I’ll pick you up, and we’ll go to the pharmacy.”
Mrs. McClusky: “Gee, I’m touched by your outpouring of compassion.”

“Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds,
that blow.
I am the diamond glimpse of snow.
I am the sunlight on amber waves of grain
I am the gentle autumns rain.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I did not die. “

Hello, again! Yesterday, I brought you some things you’ll never hear the housewives say. Well, today I want to talk about one of the men of the series: Rex Van De Kamp. Don’t get me wrong. I like Orson and he’s had some cute moments with Bree and the others, but nothing beats Rex. I think that’s because Bree and Orson are so much alike. To me, she and Rex were a better fit just because they were so different. They could bring out other sides of each other.

For those of you who tuned in late, Rex was Bree’s husband in the first season. They were on the verge of divorce and going through counseling when Rex started having some heart problems. He recovered from a heart attack and they continued to fight and deal with their kids, Rex not agreeing with some things Bree said they should do. Unfortunately for Rex, their pharmacist was obsessed with Bree and messed with his medications. Just as they were about to work things out for good, Rex has another heart attack. This time, he dies after getting a visit from his doctor who says he was poisoned. His final act in life was writing Bree an “I forgive you” note, as it appeared Bree was the one who did it.

During his time on the show, he had some great moments. Take his appearance in a season 2 flashback. The Van De Kamps are introducing themselves to the Youngs, who had just moved in. Bree is insisting on Mary Alice punishing Andrew in some way because they had caught him stealing a lawn gnome. Rex sees that Mary Alice isn’t quite sure what to think of Bree, so he pipes up with a “we’re not strange, we just seem like it” to break the tension. Another great moment came from season one. Bree, unaware that George the Pharmacist is poisoning Rex, goes out with him to get back at Rex for having had an affair. She introduces the men and Rex says “Please, you’re dating my wife. Call me Rex.” I think his top moment, though, came while they were having trouble with their son, Andrew. Bree and Andrew were arguing and Andrew actually lashed out physically at Bree. Rex happened to see it and walked in the room, grabbed Andrew and threw him against a wall as he said “If you ever touch your mother like that again, I will throw you right through this wall. You hear me?” I loved that moment because it showed that he loved Bree still and he was finally willing to get tough to stop Andrew’s out-of-control behavior.

Well, I guess that’s about all for now. I’ll leave you with one more favorite. This monologue comes from the season 3 episode “My Husband, the Pig”. Rex has taken over narration duties from Mary Alice for the day. I’d love to see this happen again (hint, hint writers!)

My name is Rex Van De Kamp. I always hated cemeteries when I was alive. Now that I’m dead, I like ‘em even less. Here’s where I used to live…a whole lot nicer, don’t you think? The place hasn’t changed much since I left…as tasteful and tidy as ever. Everything perfect…at least on the surface. My family was the same way. Look at us. You’d never guess how ticked off we all were the day this was taken, but that was the thing about us Van De Kamps. To really fit in, you had to have a smile that gave away nothing. Like my son Andrew…to look at him, you’d never know he spent six months on the streets supporting himself with panhandling and light prostitution. Or my daughter Danielle…does she look like the kind of girl who’d seduce her middle-aged history teacher? I mean, they’re my kids, and I love ‘em, but I’m pretty darn relieved to be dead. Here’s the clown Bree replaced me with…Orson. I don’t mind saying, he’s creeped me out right from the get-go. To me, he always has the shifty look of a guy who knows where the bodies are buried…and he should know. He buried them. But Bree thinks he’s Sir Galahad. The kids like him. And all my friends…now, his friends. So it pleases me to know that at least one of my old neighbors sees right through the guy.