Desperate Housewives

Good morning, everyone!! As promised, here are some great quotes from this week’s episode. I hope you all enjoy em as much as I did….

Gabby: I don’t want to spend lots of time with you, Carlos, and the kids are on the fence.

Lynette: I know you’ve always been on the receiving end of breakup letters, but I’ve actually written a few.

Jackson: Could this be any more awkward?
Mike: Your robe is open, so yeah.

Bree, defending her use of Van De Kamp for her book and company: “Van De Kamp’ drips off the tongue. ‘Hodge’ sounds like the noise a plunger makes.

Mike (speaking to Susan about his reaction to jackson canceling their night out: Jackson canceled. He said he wasn’t comfortable with our friendship. I said something along the lines of ‘Meow!’ ::makes a whipping noise::

Mike (after Susan messes up a random guy’s drink, thinking it’s Jackson’s): Since we’re not married anymore, so I don’t have to protect you.

And, now…. my personal favorite:

Tom: Are you going to tell him the truth, or are you going to wait until he kills me and blinds himself? I love that one because it’s an Oedipus Rex (My favorite classic play) joke that actually makes sense in the context of the play. It seemed funnier and less cheap then some of the Oedipus jokes I’ve heard made on TV (ANGEL, anyone?). I also love how Mike and Susan are able to be friends and actually joke with each other like they did in this episode. I just hope this isn’t leading up to their 100th reunion. So, what were your favorites? Comment and let me know. I’d love to read em! I leave you with this cool picture I found of the cast. Til next time… take care! Also… be sure to come back tomorrow for some interesting spoilage I came across reading some articles on the show.

Good morning, everyone!! So, I promised I was going to share some favorite quotes from the episode today and I will. First, though, I wanna know what you all thought of the episode. Feel free to comment and share your own reviews… did you like the situations they found themselves in now? Are you as disturbed as I am by the fact Edie and her husband look like they’re fraternal twins? Is Carlos right about Juanita, or do you side with Gabby (for the record- I’m in total agreement with Gabby, but I do think Carlos has a point, too. The situation has to be handled delicately to avoid Juanita have problems later on)? Do you think Susan is being way too hard on herself and Mike over the accident (I think that Susan is perfectly justified in feeling some guilt here. I just think she took it way too far… at some point, she needs to get some professional help and realize that there was neither car was at fault in this and sometimes really crappy stuff happens)?

Eva Longoria as Gabrielle Solis

And now… some quotes-

Bree: Andrew, dear, I’m going to take a little break. Will you tell this gentlemen that if he calls me ‘sweetie’ one more time, I’m going to grab that camera and take a picture of his colon?
Andrew (to the man, off his look): Did you get that?

Lynette (about Edie): She’s ba-ack…

Edie (to Gabrielle): What happened to you? I mean, the clothes, the hair? Carlos may be blind, that the rest of us aren’t!

Lynette (after Dave manages to get Edie to be nice and bake muffins): Please don’t take this the wrong way, but we love you.

Bree (about Katheryn accusing her of stealing her recipes for the book): Don’t be silly! I may have based a few on your recipes, but I always changed something.
Kathryn: Like what, the font?

Edie: Mrs. McClusky… you’re still alive!
Karen: It’s nice to see you, too, Edie.
Edie: This is my husband, Dave Williams.
Karen: Where’d you guys meet? Do you own a free clinic or something?

Well, that’s it for now. See y’all next time with more!! Take care.

Hey guys! With the season premiere only 5 days away, I thought we should spend the day looking at where it all started. This time it’s episode 15. Let’s start with the Mayer family this time. Susan is thrilled when the cops ask her about the night Martha was killed and she realizes that she was with Mike at the time. She’s finally got something concrete to quite the other’s fears with. After all, the cops found Martha’s stuff at his house. That is, until the police call her in to talk some more and she finds out Mike’s got a rap sheet that includes murder and drugs. She’s furious and upset about the lies and tells him to leave her alone. Mike, meanwhile, has been trying to figure out who would set him up like that. Deidre’s father promises to use his money to keep him out of trouble so he can keep the investigation going. Julie is also having a few unsettling surprises. After sneaking out to a party while Susan’s being interviewed by the cops, Zach makes a joke that really disturbs her and she leaves the party, wondering if her mom was right to worry about him.

Bree’s also got some man trouble to deal with. This time, it involves Danielle. She and John have broken up, and Danielle thinks it’s because she won’t sleep with him. This causes her to re-think the whole abstinence thing and Bree to go see John about the issue. When Bree finds out that John is actually in love with someone else, she asks him to let her down as harshly as possible so there is no chance Danielle will think she has a shot with him at some point. Also in this episode, Susan catches Andrew with a guy at the party Julie snuck off too.

The Solises are having a tough time. It’s so bad, Carlos jumps at Justin’s offer for free gardening. What he doesn’t know is, Justin has other motives for the offer. He wants to take over all of John’s duties… including the ones that involve Gabby. Gabby refuses his advances, but he’s stubborn and threatens to tell Mr. Solis about what went on between her and John. She does him one better by arriving at the apartment he and John share, ready to tell John all about the blackmail. Justin begs her not to say anything and tells her the only reason he wanted to do anything was because he thinks he might be gay. Gabrielle actually feels a bit bad for him and kisses him, letting him know he’s “definitely gay” when he says he felt nothing. Later on, She and Carlos have a talk and realize they might have to sell the house to get out of the money mess they’re in.

Finally… the Scavos. Tom comes home, complaining about how someone else got a VP promotion ahead of him. Lynette says he needs to be more forceful, which comes back to bite her later on when the guy who got the job has a heart attack and needs to be out for four months. Later on, Tom comes home and tells her he got the job after telling the boss he’d be an idiot to hold that promotion for four months. Lynette’s surprised and happy about the news until he tells her he’s going to have to travel more. This leads to a big fight where Tom puts his foot down and tells her no matter what, he’s taking the position. Lynette decides to make a few sneaky comments about all the things Tom will miss to the boss’ wife, helping Tom to lose the promotion. This won’t be the last time she messes with his career either. Well, there you have it- episode 15 in a nutshell. I leave you with some great quotes and a scene from the episode. Later!

Bree: Well, good. But why on earth would you need a condom?
Danielle: Because I’m planning on having sex and I don’t want to get pregnant.
Bree: Danielle, you are president of the Abstinence Club.
Danielle: I wasn’t planning on running for a second term.

Tom: It’s not that. This is my hating Tim Doogan look.” (in an announcer’s voice) “Oh, Doogan connects. Look at the job-stealing bastard run. Doogan is really showing some of the glory-hounding, ass-kissing hustle that he is so well known for.
Lynette: I forgot how much fun you are when you’re bitter.

Julie: Why do you hate Zach?
Susan: I don’t hate Zach. I just think he’s sort of crazy.
Julie: Mom, I’ve heard people call you sort of crazy.
Susan: Well, I’m adorable crazy, and he’s rampage crazy.

Bree: Hello, John. I’m sorry to drop by on you, unannounced. Do you have a moment?
John: Sure. So, what can I do for you?
Bree: Well, I’ll tell you. My daughter is planning on giving you her virginity and I would consider it a personal favor if you wouldn’t take it.

Good morning, all! So, last time we met, Martha was dead, Carlos and Gabby were fighting and Susan got hosed down in her front yard. This time, we open on Susan watching Lynette having trouble with the boys and having a bit of a smug look about it. Julie, after all, is perfect. At least, she is until Susan catches her kissing Zach Young. Susan freaks out and tells Julie she doesn’t want her seeing Zach. Julie throws a fit and walks off, while Lynette gets a bit of a smug look of her own now that the shoe’s on the other foot. Later on, Susan goes to speak with Paul about the situation and finds out they’re moving. Zach, meanwhile had no clue and gets upset, starting a fight right in front of Susan. Paul ends up finding out later that Zach has been talking to Julie about family stuff and grills him for details. He then volunteers to chaperone a dance with Susan so he can feed her a phoney story to explain everything, then tells Zach the truth, hoping to keep him from saying more. Zach just uses that info to force Paul to cancel the move he planned.

Over at the Solis house, Gabrielle has been recruited by John’s parents to talk him out of skipping college to grow his lawn business. Gabby refuses at first, but his mom threatens to go to the cops about the affair, changing Gabby’s mind faster than Susan breaks stuff. She heads over to John’s where he surprises her with a proposal. This really annoys John’s mom and she confronts Gabby again. Once again, Gabby promises to take care of things and gives the ring back to John, telling him they have no future and he was just a dumb toy for her so he may as well go to school.

Lynette is having a few issues with fidelity of her own. Tom’s dad shows up on the Lane and Lynette is shocked to come back one day to find him on their couch with another woman. One of the kids sees the lady’s stocking on the floor and Lynette flips, kicking him out of the house. When Lynette finds out Tom knew about it and is, in fact, casual about it, she kicks him out, too. Once she’s had a chance to cool down, she apologizes to Tom and tells him she’s just upset he was so casual about the whole thing because it makes her wonder if he’ll be doing the same thing 40 years down the line. He promises he’s not his dad, but he’s definitely hiding something.

Finally… let’s talk about the Van De Kamps. Bree and Rex are arguing over the division of assets and it’s getting a little ugly. Rex says he’ll call the whole thing off anytime Bree says the word. She’s not sure, though, because the trust has been broken and she doesn’t know what to do about that. In the meantime, she keeps seeing George and even asks his advice about the situation. He says if Rex was a good man other than the affair, he would consider forgiveness in her shoes. She considers it, and Goerge is probably secretly fuming right now at having to be that nice. Rex later shows up at the pharmacy and tells George that Bree is just using him to even the score. George disagrees, saying Bree is a lady and he now believe he was wrong in thinking Rex is a good guy. Rex demands his medicine and George lies, saying he can’t find it. He’ll have to deliver it later. As Rex leaves, we see George tossing pills down a drain.

Well, there you have it: Episode 13. I leave you, as always, with some quotes and a clip. Enjoy and see you next time!!

Lynette: You can do this, all right? Just, just scootch down a few inches, and I’ll grab you.
Parker, from the roof: No, you’ll drop me!
Lynette: I’m not gonna drop you. I might strangle you for climbing up here in the first place. But drop you, no. Come on!

Bree: I’m not speaking to you.
Rex: Didn’t like the settlement talks, huh?

Tom: Kind of. I mean, it was mostly in the past. I mean, I didn’t know that he was still at it. I mean, I figured he was getting too old. In some strange way, I‘m actually impressed, you know?

(Once Lynette has kicked both Tom and his father out of the house. The father for having an affair, Tom for not being too upset about it):
Rodney: I say we go up there and kick the door down.
Tom: Yeah, Dad, you do that. Let me know how that works out for you.

John: Okay, sure. We’d be poor at first, but we’d be happy.
Gabrielle: I’ve tried poor but happy. Guess what. It wasn’t that happy.

Good evening, everyone! I’m back with a recap of season 1, episode 12. It’s an episode called “Everyday, a Little Death”. As you remember, Martha had gone missing and her sister, Felicia, showed up on Wysteria Lane. In this episode, Martha’s body has been found and the police are trying to figure out what happened to her. True to the nosy world of Wysteria Lane, word of her murder spreads quickly and Felicia plays to the crowd by giving as many gory details of the crime as possible. She further shocks and confuses everyone by announcing an estate sale set for 2 days from now where she’ll accept no personal checks. She’s also keeping herself busy by going through all of Martha’s journals to make sure to gets rid of any embarrassing family secrets in them before the police read them.

One person who is really affected by Martha’s death is Edie. She’s so upset, she wants to arrange a memorial for her when Felicia refuses. To her annoyance almost no one wants to attend. Susan, however, volunteers since she’s afraid that Martha mentioned her accidentally burning Edie’s house down. She and Edie drive out to a lake and end up having a talk while Susan changes a flat tire that actually seems to help things between them. That is, until Edie starts going on about what a wonderful friend Susan is while rowing out to spread Martha’s ashes. Susan feels so guilty she spills the arson beans and Edie, in one of her greater moments actually throws Martha’s ashes in Susan’s face, ordering Susan to row her back to the shore. When they get back to Wysteria Lane, Edie tells her she won’t go to the police because it would just delay her insurance check. She does, however, want Susan to invite her to the weekly poker games. She also orders Susan to stand on her front lawn while Edie sprays Huber’s ashes off her so Martha will be able to spend eternity looking over the neighborhood.

Gabrielle and Carlos, meanwhile, are once again fighting about babies. Carlos thinks a grandchild would make his mother happy. Gabrielle doesn’t care and refuses. This leads to a big fight where Gabrielle talks the takeout food she brought home outside and eats out of the range of Carlos’ ankle bracelet so he can’t get any. Later on, she apologizes and tells him how she’ll have some time to spend with him in a few days once a show she’s doing is over. Carlos is still worried, though, that Gabrielle will end up leaving him once the courts are done with him despite her promises she won’t. This ends up leading to something big later…

Bree spends most of the episode hanging out with George and teaching him to fire a gun. He’s more interested in making out, which surprises Bree so much she accidentally shoots him in the foot. She tries to apologize and ends up telling him they may need to spend time apart because she’s not ready to go there yet…. not while she’s still married to Rex. He asks her to reconsider because he doesn’t want to lose her friendship. Later, we see he’s completely creepy and weird when he sits down to dinner and a video of Bree shopping at the pharmacy, courtesy of the store’s security camera.

Finally… Lynette. I really don’t even want to go here, because her plot this episode annoys me to no end. Lynette’s been trying to go to yoga and hasn’t been able to get in on time to get the kids not in school into the daycare there. So, one day she tries again after having to shave Parker’s head thanks to the other boys putting bubblegum in his hair. The receptionist sees that and the sniffling kid and thinks he’s got cancer, immediately giving him a spot in the center. Lynette does nothing to correct her until a cancer survivor hears about it and asks to talk to Parker, scaring the kid.

Well, that’s all for now. See y’all tomorrow morning with more. Take care and enjoy these quotes from the episode, along with the promo for it.

Susan: What, you think there’s a chance Mrs. Huber didn’t write about it in the journal?
Julie: Please. It’s great dirt. I even put it in my journal. you’re gonna have to get to Mrs. Britt and come clean. Convince her it was an accident. If she doesn’t press charges, the police will probably just let it go.

Gabrielle: No, you promised, no babies!
Carlos: Things change!
Gabrielle: Yeah, I know. The Feds towed away my Maserati. My husband is a felon, and I spend my days getting groped by fat tracker salesmen at trade shows. I am well aware things change!

Bree: I’m still married to Rex. I mean, we’re not even legally separated yet.
George: He cheated on you. You said you were going to hate him forever.
Bree: You shouldn’t listen to a woman who’s just had her heart broken. We tend to lie.

Susan: Well, you know high school. Thank God we leave that behind!
Edie: See, I don’t think we do. I’m still the outsider that doesn’t get invited to the cool parties, and you’re still the perky cheerleader who thinks that she can pull the wool over everyone’s eyes.

Good morning! Well, it’s time once again to look back at the first season of the show. If you remember, last time they realized Martha was missing. Well, this week her sister shows up: Felicia Tillman. She’s not anywhere near as worried or hopeful as everyone else. She knows for a fact her sister is gone because she felt it. Edie, meanwhile, keeps trying to convince Felicia to have hope and not freak out. Felicia informs her that she is not freaking out. She doesn’t even like her sister. Edie is taken aback by that, but continues the search with help from others in the neighborhood. Sadly, the search is going to turn up a dead body at the end of the episode.

Meanwhile, Gabby is feeling the pressure of Carlos being in jail. Money is tight and all she’s able to get is some low-paying stuff showing off cars and similar things. After having to cover-up the fact she’s modeling a car from the Scavos, Gabby decides she just might need Carlos after all. She fishes the burnt passport out and calls his lawyer to start the bail process.

Over at the Scavo house, Lynette is annoyed to discover that Tom his accidently seeing the new nanny naked. Especially since he slept with her right after. Lynette insists he admit he’s got an attraction to Claire. After denying it several times, he finally gives in. They later decide to call an agency to get a new nanny.

Susan is also having some relationship problems this week. Mike has said ‟I Love You‟ and Susan isn’t sure she’s ready to say it back. It finally takes Karl admitting he still cares about her for Susan to see that she doesn’t have any lingering feelings for Karl at all, despite what Mike thinks. She then runs over to Mike’s to tell him she loves him, too.

Finally, we have the Van De Kamps. Bree is peeved about the affair and what’s to let Rex fend for himself after he is released from the hospital. The kids aren’t happy with this, and Andrew demands that Bree take care of his father or else. Bree agrees to give in, but swears that Rex is out of there the minute he’s recovered. In the meantime, she decides to go out with their pharmacist, George. This, of course, irritates Andrew and he confronts Bree over it. She then tells Andrew the truth and suddenly, he’s on Bree’s side. Bree says that she will continue to care for Rex until he’s strong enough to leave out of respect for their marriage.

Well, there you have it: Episode 11 in a nutshell. I leave you, as always with some great quotes and a clip:

Paul: “I just wanted you to know that everyone on Wisteria Lane is praying for your sister’s safe return.”
Felicia: “Oh, I seriously doubt that.”

Andrew: “You’re so selfish. You know, I’m so looking forward to the day I get to put you in a nursing home.”
Bree: “I’m sorry to disappoint you, Andrew, but my plan is to have an embolism and to die young!”

Bree: “Do me a favor, Rex. Please don’t mistake my anal retentiveness for actual affection.”

Susan: “Actually, you’re coming to the party tomorrow. And that’s the end of it.”
Mike (to himself): “That is what I get for saying ‘I love you’.”

George: “It was nice talking with you, Dr. Van de Kamp.”
Rex: “Please, you’re dating my wife! Call me Rex!”

Good morning, everyone… last time we recapped the first season Gabby got busted and Andrew hit Mama Solis. Well, now things really pick up….

Bree is desperate to protect Andrew, so she and Rex take his car to a bad area and wait for someone to take it and clear him of any responsibility in the accident. Rex isn’t sure about the plan at first, but agrees to go along with it. Bree, on the other hand, starts regretting the whole thing when Andrew makes some pretty heartless comments about Mama Solis and the accident.

Bree isn’t the only one feeling guilty right now. John says he wants to break things off with Gabby. If they hadn’t been together like that, Mama Solis would’ve have been there and gotten hit. He also reveals he’d spoken to a priest about the whole thing. Gabby is shocked and upset, later going to the man herself to make sure he won’t spill any details. He tries to convince her she needs to repent as well, but she won’t have any of it. Instead, she chooses to sooth her conscience by staying with Mama Solis a lot and helping Carlos.

Susan freaks out after finding some money and a gun in Mike’s kitchen right before they’re about to go away together for the weekend. She tries to snoop while he’s gone, but that plan backfires and they fight over it, with Susan demanding to know what’s going on. He tells her there is nothing odd going on. The money is his savings and the gun is for protection. They fight some more and she leaves. Later on, Mike decides to take a chance and says he’ll answer anything she wants to know. She tells him that he’s already told her all she needs to know and they make up.

Lynette is still popping ADD pills to get everything done and it’s catching up to her. She’s tired all the time and feeling like a loser. Finally, she goes to a doctor to get some herbal remedies that will help her sleep. Unfortunately, just as she’s taken some a bunch of kids show up for a scout meeting she’s supposed to run. So, Lynette runs upstairs to pop more pills so she can get through it. Eventually, she decides she needs a break and hands her children off to Susan. Susan, of course, is worried about the way Lynette looked and how fast she took off and tells the ladies. They all go searching for her, eventually finding her in a park. Lynette confesses everything and the other housewives comfort her by saying they don’t have it any easier than she does. No mom is perfect. Lynette seems to feel better about this.

Finally… there was a little bit with Paul as well. Convinced now that Edie was the one who wrote the note, he hires someone to “take care of her”. When the hitman finds out from Edie that she had stolen the stationary Paul saw from Martha Huber, the guy realizes he’s got the wrong woman and goes to Paul with the information, offering to take Martha out instead. Paul declines and goes to see Martha himself. Once he confronts her with the blackmail scheme, they fight a bit and Paul suddenly knocks Martha to the floor, strangling her. Once she’s dead, he wraps her body up and prepares to get rid of it.

And there you have it: Episode 8 in a nutshell. Well, I better be going now. I leave you with some great quotes, as usual, and a clip of the ending narration for the episode. Enjoy and I’ll see ya next time!

Susan: Well what? Realistically, I’ve known this guy a few weeks. I mean, he could be a hit man for the mob!
Julie: If you really think that, why are going on a trip with him?
Susan: I never get out of the house.

Julie: That’s Dad. I gotta go. Now, listen to me. No more freaking out. I need this weekend to go well.
Susan: Why do you care so much?
Julie: Because I’m gonna have a husband of my own someday, and I really don’t want you living with us.

Carlos: Face it. We’re shallow people. I mean, can our lives have any meaning if all we ever do is buy stuff?
Gabrielle: That depends on what we buy.

Carlos: Yeah, well, deals were meant to be renegotiated.
Gabrielle: Well, we’re not negotiating my uterus.

Good morning, everyone! I thought we’d jump back into recapping the first season today, so let’s get to it! The episode is called “Anything You Can Do”.

Andrew’s having problems in school and Rex and Bree get called in because of it. Rex tries to explain away everything by mentioning they’re having marital problems, but Bree argues that’s not excuse and tries to downplay everything. Rex counters and announces right then and there Bree will be getting divorce papers later on. Later on, Rex gets Andrew a car and allows Danielle to go to a modeling school. Bree feels their being spoiled and wants them to give the gifts back. Rex and the kids don’t see it that way. Bree decides to force their hands by hiring a locksmith and throwing all the kid’s stuff on the lawn. If they give back and the gifts and stay with her, she’ll give them the new keys. Danielle gives in, but Andrew refuses and goes to Rex to ask to move in. Rex won’t let him and Andrew storms off, deciding to get drunk to he can face having to kiss up to Bree to get back in the house.

Andrew

Lynette, meanwhile, is popping ADHD pills to get all the stuff she needs to do done. She happens to run out just as Tom announces he wants to throw a business dinner, so she steals some from a neighbor to get through the evening. She is, by the way, a hit and practically steals the show by throwing around all kinds of great ideas. Tom is a bit upset, but they talk things through and she apologizes.

Lyennte and Bree

Over at Susan’s, she’s humiliated when her long-awaited date with Mike is cancelled due to a pretty houseguest. Edie doesn’t help matters by rubbing it in. She convinces Susan to follow Mike and his friend to a club to see what’s going on between them. When Mike sees her, Susan pretends she’s just there to ride the bull. She ends up falling off it and getting even more embarrassed. Later, she and Mike’s friend talk and she’s convinced they really are just friends. Although, the woman does drop a hint that Mike’s hiding something.

Edie actually gets quite a bit of time this episode alongside the Youngs, since she’s selling their house. She advises him to pretend like Mary Alice crawled outside to die because suicides tend to freak out buyers. Paul, meanwhile, has become convinced that Edie is the one who sent that note to Mary Alice after finding some stationary in her stuff that looks the same. He wants her taken care of.

Finally, at the Solis house, John is ready to end the whole affair cause he and Gabby never get to see each other now that Mama Solis is around. He even starts going out now and then with Danielle. Gabby doesn’t like this and convinces him to at least meet up with her one more time. Mama Solis, who has been spying, knows for sure they’re sneaking around and crashes their little rendevous with a camera. John, freaked out, chases her to get it back. Unfortunately for Mama Solis, she runs straight into the path of a car that’s being driven by a very drunk Andrew.

Gabrielle

Well, there ya have it, the latest recap. Have a great weekend and I’ll see y’all again on Monday. Take care! As usual, I leave you with some of my favorite quotes…

Julie: Mom, you’re getting too dressed up.
Susan: I know, but I wanna look really sexy.
Julie: I told Mike I expect him to have you home by eleven.
Susan: Hmm. How about midnight?
Julie: All right, but no later. You know how I worry.

Edie: Wow! Get a load of you! You look so pretty. I hardly recognize you.

Edie: Hey, how was your big date?
Susan: Mike had to reschedule.
Edie: Oh. Because of the hot girl? With the suitcase? Over there? Gosh, how devastating for you.

Gabrielle: “It’s her dream, and don’t you want her to be happy?”
Bree: “No, and in the future I would appreciate you keeping your ridiculous ideas to yourself!”

Edie: “Hmm, think so? I overheard them saying they’re going to the Saddle Ranch tonight. For drinks. And dancing.”
Susan: “So friends can do that.”
Edie: “Oh my god, I just want to slap and shake you.”

Good morning, everyone. Ready to catch up on season 1 some more? This time, we’re gonna talk about the episode “Running to Stand Still”.

When we left The Solis house last time, Carlos’ mom had just shown up to find out whether or not Gabby is having an affair. This time, however, Gabby has an even better advantage. After Mama Solis participates in the weekly poker game, Carlos reveals that she once had a seriously gambling problem. Gabby pretends to be concerned, but later brings Mama Solis to a casino for “lunch”. Gabby then pretends like she has to rush to the mall to pick up something and they’ll eat there instead. Mama Solis refuses to leave, telling Gabby she’ll wait for her there. Gabby agrees and drives off with a smile while calling John. When she gets back, Mama Solis has charged $15,000 on Carlos’ credit card. To save her own butt, Gabby tells Juanita she’ll sell some jewelry and pay off the debt with Carlos never knowing a thing. This convinces Mama Solis that Gabby really does love Carlos and she’s not running around. Carlos is relieved to hear it and mentions telling Gabby about her gambling problem. Juanita is once again suspicious.

Lynette, meanwhile, is in a war of her own. Maisy Gibbons is in charge of the school play and wants to change the ending of “Little Red Riding Hood” because it will be too upsetting for the kids. Lynette disagrees, but Maisy won’t listen because Lynette is only taking tickets the night of the show and not doing a harder job. When Maisy suddenly needs someone to take over the costumes, Lynette volunteers and once again brings up the issue of changing the ending. The group ends up siding with her and Maisy is so upset she purposefully leaves Lynette off the program. When Lynette finds out, she challanges Maisy and the woman backs down

Susan is, of course, spending her time being nosy… a common plot for her. She knows Paul is up to something and is determined to find out what he’s hiding. She tries talking to him, but he’s not very open. Finally, she follows him one day and discovers that Paul has put Zach into a home for disturbed kids. Now, she’s really curious and enlists Julie to talk to the kid. She sets up an appointment to talk to one of the doctors as “research” for a new book. While the man is busy talking to her, Julie sneaks in and sees Zach. All she’s able to find out, however, is that whatever Zach did has to do with someone named Dana. Before he can explain, a nurse comes in and makes Julie leave. Now, Susan is even more curious.

Finally, there’s Bree. She and Rex are still seeing a counselor and it seems to be going alright. The only major issue Rex is having is their sex life. Bree is shocked and refuses to admit there’s a problem there. After a private conversation with the Doctor, Bree decides to surprise Rex at his motel room, but the mood is ruined by a burrito about to spill. Rex is so mad she couldn’t let the mess go, he tells her to leave. Later, Bree tries to get him to talk about what the real problem is, but he refuses.

Well, there you have it! Episode 6 in a nutshell. Before I go, I wanna leave you with some funny quote from the episode and a brief clip of Mama Solis and Carlos. Enjoy and I’ll see ya next time!!

Bree: I must say, I’m jealous of how much time you two spend together. My mother-in-law would never want to hang out with me all day.
Gabrielle: She sounds nice.

Dr. Goldfine: Do you have any questions?
Bree: (to Rex) Just one. How much longer is your midlife crisis going to last, because it is really starting to tick me off!

Julie: How am I supposed to blend in with a bunch of messed up teenagers?
Susan: I don’t know, Julie. You pretend to be bulimic. Gag a little. Come on, work with me here!
Julie: Mom, when this is over, we need to talk about your parenting skills.

Good morning everyone!! I’d like to continue the recaps today with a quick look at the episode “Come In, Stranger”. This one starts with the Mayers. Susan and Julie are cat-sitting and can’t find the cat. Lucky for them, just as they’re switching rooms a strange man walks through and leaves, opening the door again a minute later to put the cat who had just followed him out back inside. Susan finds evidence there was a break-in and the whole Lane is freaked out. They organize a community watch and Susan gives the screwdriver she found to the cop in charge. He later asks her out, but she stops seeing him when she finds out he lied about taking the screwdriver to the crime lab. Mike is, of course, relieved to find out about that later because it was his. He had been snooping around the houses looking for a killer.

Gabrielle, meanwhile, has her hands full with her mother-in-law. Carlos invited the woman to stay without telling Gabby because he suspects she’s cheating. So now, Gabby has to try and find ways to ditch Juanita so she can see John. Juanita is so good at keeping tabs on her, Gabby has to resort to setting her up as a shoplifter to get time away from her. Mama Solis isn’t too happy and is more sure that something is going on.

While all that is going on, Bree is freaking out about being alone in the house for the first time in 17 years. Rex has moved out and the kids are going on a camping trip. She asks Rex to stay, but he refuses. She ends up finding something else to keep her busy, though. She is going to patrol the Lane as part of the neighborhood watch with Paul. When she shows up at his house to find he’s left for the day, she ends up striking up a little friendship with Zach. She even offers to cook him a big holiday-themed meal… especially when he makes a cryptic comment about his mom’s suicide. That friendship, and the fact Zach has broken into Bree’s house to decorate it for the holidays for her, leads to many fights between him and Paul throughout the episode. The one bright spot for Bree in the whole thing is, Rex finally calls and invites her to dinner.

Finally, there’s Lynette. She actually bugged me just a little in this one. She wants Bree to lie to a private school about the twins so the school will accept them. Bree argues that she doesn’t want to lie to them and ruin the good name she has there, as she hopes to get her grandkids in there someday. Lynette? Doesn’t really care. Now that the twins have pretty much been thrown out of public school, she’s desperate to avoid home schooling. Bree relents and gets them the interview. Lynette makes sure the kids are too tired to cause any trouble the day of the meeting and the kids are accepted. Assuming, of course, the Scavos will donate 15,000 to the school. Lynette talks Tom into selling his boat to get the money.

Well, that’s about it for that episode. It was a pretty good one with lots of action. It also gave us a bit more of a hint about what Mike’s up to. I’ll leave you now with some funny quotes and a youtube video. The video is actually a promo for the spanish version of that same episode. Now, I don’t know the people and characters for sure, but I believe that Carlos and Mama Solis’ spanish counterparts are in it, as well as the spanish versions of Gabby and John. Enjoy!! See ya next time!

Lynette: We need you to recommend Porter and Preston. We can’t even get an interview.
Bree: Oh, you, um, want me to recommend the twins?
Lynette: Yes. You can tell them how beautifully behaved the boys are.
Bree: So you want me to lie.
Lynette: Yeah. I thought that was understood.

Rex: Honey, I know it’s hard to hear, but the marriage counseling might not work out. You need to get used to being alone.
Bree: You’re right. That was hard to hear.
Rex: What are you doing?
Bree: That is for the kids trip.
Rex: Oh, come on. I’m, I’m staying at a motel. I haven’t had a decent meal in weeks.
Bree: Honey! The marriage counseling might not work out. You need to get used to bad cooking.

Officer Thompson: (after Susan turns him down for a date) Yeah, well, it’s just hard to rescue folks when you don’t feel good about yourself. Ah, they’ll probably all die anyway.
Susan: Okay, fine. I’ll go out with you.
Officer Thompson: Great. I’ll call you.
Susan: Now that you’ve gotten your date, you can tell me what that really means — that 907a.
Officer Thompson: Someone’s TV was playing too loud.
Susan: Well, thank God for the thin blue line.

Tom: Maybe it’s time that we look into homeschooling.
Lynette: I know you did not just say that.

Gabrielle: Oh, for God sakes, Bree, you’re a woman. Manipulate him. That’s what we do.

Susan: Mm, I got one — Kelly Halsteder. In eighth grade, she used to spit in my gym shoes.
Officer Thompson: Kelly Halsteder. Kelly Halsteder. There, look. Two DUIs, one check kiting, and an open bench warrant.
Susan: How tragic, by which I mean yay.”

Good morning everyone!! Before I get back to recaps of the series, I’d like to take a minute to put the spotlight on one of my favorite neighbors, Karen Cluskey and the woman who plays her. She’s been there pretty much from the beginning and has slowly taken on a more prominent role. Once no more than a cranky neighbor that Lynette hated, she’s now her babysitter and a good friend to her and the Scavo family.

One of the best things to me about the character is the fact she’s a straight-shooter. She says exactly what’s on her mind and isn’t afraid of anyone. From defending the Scavo kids from a “kidnapper” to helping Lynette scatter Ida Greenberg’s ashes, she has some of the cooler scenes of the neighbors. While she is a bit of a “hard” type, she has shown quite a few times over the years that she’s also got a vulnerable and human side. One of those moments was when she begged Lynette to come with her because she was scared to go to the hospital alone. Another was when she revealed to the Scavo kids her son had died at a very young age. You could see the sadness and a longing for the past in her eyes during that one, even though she tried not to show anything.

One of her odder moments came in Season 3. It was during the episodes “Liaisons” and “God, that’s Good”. In these episodes, Ida Greenberg and Parker Scavo find the dead body of her husband in the freezer. Turns out, she came home one day several years ago to find he had passed suddenly. Scared of losing her home and everything she’s got after finding out his first wife would get his pension, she hides his body so the company thinks he’s alive and she can keep collecting the checks. Talk about desperation!

As for the woman who plays her, Kathryn Joosten herself seems like quite the lady. Once a psychiatric nurse, she later married and had two children. Sadly, they ended up divorcing due to her husband’s drinking problem and Kathryn had to figure out what to do with herself. She took a chance of rekindling her childhood love of acting during her 40s and the rest is history. She has guested on many series, including Buffy, the X-Files and Joan of Arcadia. She is also a lung cancer survivor and has won an Emmy for her part on Housewives. Given all this, I think it’s safe to say she’s just as spunky and determined as the character she plays. Now that they’re shooting again, it shouldn’t be long before all you spoiler readers out there find out what happened to her character. Me? I think I’ll just wait and be surprised.

Well, I’m out of here for now… stay tuned for those recaps I’ll be starting up again tomorrow. I leave you guys with some great McCluskey quotes. Enjoy!!

Lynette: “Are you sure you didn’t misplace it? No offense, but you’re getting up there in the years.”
Mrs. McCluskey: “No offense, but you should be sterilised.”

Lynette: “Let me tell you something. Half of life is obligations. You don’t want to go to your husband’s company Christmas party, but you do. You don’t want to sell candy so your kid’s band can buy piccolos, but you do it. You attend your third cousin’s wedding. You pick up the dry cleaning. That’s life. It’s obligations. And you are now my obligation, so tomorrow morning, I’ll pick you up, and we’ll go to the pharmacy.”
Mrs. McClusky: “Gee, I’m touched by your outpouring of compassion.”

“Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds,
that blow.
I am the diamond glimpse of snow.
I am the sunlight on amber waves of grain
I am the gentle autumns rain.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I did not die. “

Good morning, everyone! It’s time once again to take a look back at the first season of Desperate Housewives. Today, I’d like to take a look back at episode 4, “Who’s That Woman?”

The episode starts with Lynette going through her daily routine, obviously not happy with what she’s doing. It doesn’t help that she gets a call from the school about the twins. It turns out they painted a little girl blue and now the school believes they need to take medication for ADD. Lynette wants to try separating the twins first. She’s worried that if she starts medicating them, they won’t be the same children anymore. She eventually tries to, but gives in quickly when the twins refuse to take it.

Susan spends most of this episode pretending not to like Mike in front of Mrs. Huber, who is now blackmailing her. She manages to get Susan to pay for her groceries, but when she wants Susan to pay for a broken water heater, too, Susan decides enough is enough and confesses what she did to Julie. Julie agrees to help her steal the measuring cup from Mrs. Huber so there is no more evidence. When Mrs. Huber discovers it’s missing, she confronts Susan who pretends like she has no idea what Huber is talking about.

Over at the Van de Kamps, Bree has told the kids that Rex had to go to a medical conference. They don’t buy it, though. Andrew blames Bree for his dad leaving and starts giving her attitude. When she calls him on it, Andrew points out he knows what’s going on between her and Rex and that he blames her for it. Bree is shocked and angry about his behavior, especially when he doesn’t come home one night. She decides to search his room and finds a match book for a strip club among his things. Two guesses where she goes next…. it does, by the way, lead to a hilarious scene where Andrew is trying to enjoy the show while Bree goes on about the strippers being victims of molestation and other such things. A man sitting beside them begs Andrew to leave because Bree is spoiling the fun for everyone.

Meanwhile, Gabrielle and John’s romantic bath is interrupted by the cable guy showing up late. John sneaks out while Gabby shows the man in, who apologizes for being so late. While he’s working, he accidently slips and hurts himself, having to be taken away in an ambulance. Carlos becomes suspicious about the fact the cable guy arrived so late (not to mention he found a sock under the bed) and starts asking questions. Gabby assures him the maid uses socks to clean. Carlos, having a working brain cell, doesn’t really believe it and starts questioning John about the cable guy. John is nervous and obviously is lying, so Carlos assumes John is trying to protect Gabrielle and her affair with the cable guy. So, he shows up at the guy’s house and starts beating him up. Carlos soon notices pictures and other things in the house that makes him realize he’s beating up a gay man for sleeping with Gabby. He quickly leaves.

Finally…. all the housewives listen to the tape Bree stole from her doctor’s office and discover Mary Alice’s real name was Angela. They decide it’s time to go to Paul with the note after hearing the tape. When they do, Paul pretends that Mary Alice was crazy and used to write odd notes like this all the time. The girls don’t believe him and are relieved to find out he’s planning to move.

Well, that’s all for now. See ya next time!! I leave you now with some great quotes from the episode…

Susan- Oh, I’m trying a new strategy. I’m playing hard to get.
Julie- How long do you think you can keep that up?
Susan- Oh, maybe until noon. Then I’m gonna have to run over there and beg him to love me.

Mrs. Huber- Oh, good Lord, Susan. You burned your rival’s house down. If that isn’t desperate, I don’t know what is.

Bree- Lynette, you are a great mother, but let’s face it. Your kids are…a challenge.
Lynette- Thank you. That’s the nicest way you could have said that.

Susan- And when I realized I couldn’t put out the fire, I ran. I must have dropped the measuring cup in the process.
Julie- Why do I even let you out of the house?

Bree- I shouldn’t have lied to you about your father. You and sister are old enough to handle the truth and I’m sorry.
Andrew- Keep going. I’m mad at you for about seven thousand other things.
Bree- If you think I’m going to apologize for taking you out of a strip club, you’re wrong. I consider it one of my finest moments.

Hello, again! Yesterday, I brought you some things you’ll never hear the housewives say. Well, today I want to talk about one of the men of the series: Rex Van De Kamp. Don’t get me wrong. I like Orson and he’s had some cute moments with Bree and the others, but nothing beats Rex. I think that’s because Bree and Orson are so much alike. To me, she and Rex were a better fit just because they were so different. They could bring out other sides of each other.

For those of you who tuned in late, Rex was Bree’s husband in the first season. They were on the verge of divorce and going through counseling when Rex started having some heart problems. He recovered from a heart attack and they continued to fight and deal with their kids, Rex not agreeing with some things Bree said they should do. Unfortunately for Rex, their pharmacist was obsessed with Bree and messed with his medications. Just as they were about to work things out for good, Rex has another heart attack. This time, he dies after getting a visit from his doctor who says he was poisoned. His final act in life was writing Bree an “I forgive you” note, as it appeared Bree was the one who did it.

During his time on the show, he had some great moments. Take his appearance in a season 2 flashback. The Van De Kamps are introducing themselves to the Youngs, who had just moved in. Bree is insisting on Mary Alice punishing Andrew in some way because they had caught him stealing a lawn gnome. Rex sees that Mary Alice isn’t quite sure what to think of Bree, so he pipes up with a “we’re not strange, we just seem like it” to break the tension. Another great moment came from season one. Bree, unaware that George the Pharmacist is poisoning Rex, goes out with him to get back at Rex for having had an affair. She introduces the men and Rex says “Please, you’re dating my wife. Call me Rex.” I think his top moment, though, came while they were having trouble with their son, Andrew. Bree and Andrew were arguing and Andrew actually lashed out physically at Bree. Rex happened to see it and walked in the room, grabbed Andrew and threw him against a wall as he said “If you ever touch your mother like that again, I will throw you right through this wall. You hear me?” I loved that moment because it showed that he loved Bree still and he was finally willing to get tough to stop Andrew’s out-of-control behavior.

Well, I guess that’s about all for now. I’ll leave you with one more favorite. This monologue comes from the season 3 episode “My Husband, the Pig”. Rex has taken over narration duties from Mary Alice for the day. I’d love to see this happen again (hint, hint writers!)

My name is Rex Van De Kamp. I always hated cemeteries when I was alive. Now that I’m dead, I like ‘em even less. Here’s where I used to live…a whole lot nicer, don’t you think? The place hasn’t changed much since I left…as tasteful and tidy as ever. Everything perfect…at least on the surface. My family was the same way. Look at us. You’d never guess how ticked off we all were the day this was taken, but that was the thing about us Van De Kamps. To really fit in, you had to have a smile that gave away nothing. Like my son Andrew…to look at him, you’d never know he spent six months on the streets supporting himself with panhandling and light prostitution. Or my daughter Danielle…does she look like the kind of girl who’d seduce her middle-aged history teacher? I mean, they’re my kids, and I love ‘em, but I’m pretty darn relieved to be dead. Here’s the clown Bree replaced me with…Orson. I don’t mind saying, he’s creeped me out right from the get-go. To me, he always has the shifty look of a guy who knows where the bodies are buried…and he should know. He buried them. But Bree thinks he’s Sir Galahad. The kids like him. And all my friends…now, his friends. So it pleases me to know that at least one of my old neighbors sees right through the guy.

Good morning, everyone! Today, I want to take you back to 2004 and the episode that started it all. The episode begins with Mary Alice Young doing a voice over about her day as a montage of her running errands and such plays. All of a sudden, it cuts to present time and Mary Alice pulls a gun out and shoots herself. The rest of the episode features each of her friends mourning her loss as they deal with their own problems.

Susan likes the new neighbor, Mike, but she’s too scared to ask him out. Her daughter manages to talk her into it, but by then Edie has already set her sight on him as well. And so starts a rivalry we’ll see many times over the years. Susan discovers Mrs. Huber is watching Edie’s son because of a big date and fears the worst. She goes over under the pretense of borrowing sugar, but doesn’t get an answer. She walks in through a side door only to find clothes thrown about. This depresses her, so she sits down to grab some chocolate, tossing a bra over her shoulder. This hits one of the lit candles and starts a fire. Susan panics and runs, getting upset later when she learns the guy Edie was with got smoke inhalation. Her mood improves again when Mike shows up and she realizes he wasn’t Edie’s big date after all.

Gabby and Carlos spend much of the pilot bickering over a client of his that likes to touch Gabby’s butt, the gifts he buys and their gardener. It’s hard to believe these two end up turning out the way they did. Their arguing seems much nastier and with no humor to it in this one. It’s revealed after Carlos heads out to work that Gabrielle has been messing around with the gardener, hence the reason Carlos sees not much has been done to the lawn. He finally has enough one night when he sees the lawn hasn’t been mowed. Gabby tries to distract Carlos and get them out of there. Once they arrive at the party, Gabby makes sure Carlos is given plenty to drink so she can sneak out and mow the lawn herself, saving John’s job and her affair.

Lynette spends much of this episode dealing with her bratty kids while Tom is away on business. They cause trouble at the grocery store, at home, even at Mary Alice’s wake. At the wake, they all jump in the pool and refuse to come out, forcing Lynette to go in after them and drag them all out. Through all the trouble, Tom remains oblivious and even says they should “risk it” when Lynette asks him to use protection. That, of course, is met with a punch to the face by Lynette that puts an end to all the action that was about to happen.

Finally, there’s Bree. The picture of perfection on the outside, but underneath she’s not happy. Her family is miserable, too. They’d rather have pork and beans than wait for her to take three hours to make some gourmet meal. Rex is so fed up with her focus on perfection, he tells her he wants a divorce while they’re out to dinner. Bree is shocked, but tries to brush it off and act like everything is fine. They are, after all, out in public. She’s so upset (though she won’t show it), she accidently puts onions in Rex’s salad, causing him an allergic reaction. While at the hospital, Rex finally lets it all out about how much he hates perfection and wants her to be more like she used to be. I personally have a hard time believing Bree ever burnt toast and was anything other than perfectly neat.

As the episode ends, all the women gather to help get rid of Mary Alice’s things. They end up finding a note in them saying “I know what you did. It makes me sick. I’m going to tell.” The camera pans away with all the women wondering what it means.

I love this episode. There were so many classic moments in it and everyone’s characters were introduced perfectly. I would say Lynette was probably the best, even though I loved everyone in this one. Felicity Huffman captures a tired, stressed-out mom wonderfully and who doesn’t love that scene of her dragging those kids out of the pool while trying to maintain some dignity? Well, that’s all for now. See y’all next time with more reviews, news and other stuff. For now, I leaves you with some great lines from the pilot. Enjoy!

“Carlos, who worked in mergers and acquisitions, proposed on their third date. Gabrielle was touched when tears welled up in his eyes. But she soon discovered that this happened every time Carlos closed a big deal.” - Mary Alice

“When Rex started going to those medical conferences, I wanted it in the back of his mind that he had a loving wife at home with a loaded Smith & Wesson.” - Bree

“Oh, please. The man’s gotten me pregnant three times in four years. I wish he was having sex with someone else.” - Lynette

Susan: So, is that your project for school? You know, when I was in fifth grade, I made the White House out of sugar cubes.
Julie: Stop stalling and go before Mike figures out he can do better.
Susan: Tell me again why I fought for custody for you.
Julie: You were using me to hurt dad.

Rex: I can’t believe you tried to kill me.
Bree: Yes, well, I feel badly about that.