Desperate Housewives

So remember last week when Edie had bared all to Carlos and their “doing it” was imminent? Remember that? Well, they did do it and apparently, it wasn’t very good. After some sniping back and forth, they decide they need to try again because there’s no good reason why it wasn’t very good. This time, they both end up in Urgent Care from the injuries they sustained from bad sex. Har! So, they’re just going to be friends. Because obviously the “other” isn’t going to happen. Or is it? After sharing a Warm Moment over a photo of them with Travers where they look like a real family (aww), things get a little romantic. And then, apparently, it was good. So the answer is… romance? I guess? I don’t know.

Gaby does the deed with her mayorial candidate as well and while it was good, he doesn’t give her a call afterward. And this really chaps Gaby’s hide. So she does what any normal woman would do, she goes to one of his public debates with some random guy and sits in the front row. Then, the two proceed to put on a grope-fest. This unnerves dear Victor so much that he fumbles pretty much the rest of the debate. He then starts sending her giant displays of red and white roses and calling her and she ignores the heck out of him. Cuz, you know, she’s petty like that. Finally, she takes him back in when he ends up on her doorstep, begging for forgiveness. Oh, and he tells her he loves her which she totally buys and forgives him. Whatever, both of them are spoiled brats.

Lynette is busy, busy, busy with the pizzeria. Tom is home in a hospital bed, laid up. Mrs. McCluskey is charged with watching after him and the boys but he ends up insulting her so she refuses to help out any more. Way to go, Tom. So Lynette has to take the kids to work and that works out about as well as you’d imagine. A lego ends up in someone’s pizza. Yeah, that’s great, huh? So Lynette is interviewing people to help out while Tom is laid up and every candidate is totally awful until this one guy who was a sous chef at a famous restaurant. That is, until he decided he was doing way too much cocaine. Tom doesn’t want to hire him but he’s the best man for the job, so Lynette ends up taking him on anyhow. And word has it, this guy will turn up the charm with Lynette, so Tom better watch out. Also, proposing sexual activities that require your wife to do the bulk of the work after she’s had a long, hard day at work is probably not your best bet. Just something to think about. Sheesh.

Susan and Ian are doing well, that is, until she drives them off the road and into a lake. Whoops! Seriously though, knowing she’s as accident prone as she is, would Ian ever let her do the driving? I don’t think so. They’re both fine and holding onto the upside-down floating car (wtf? Wouldn’t it sink like a rock?) and Susan proposes they swim to shore. A perfectly sane suggestion, I think. Ian won’t have it, because he can’t swim. Whatever. Just so happens, Mike is driving by and sees the car in the lake and jumps out, takes off his shirt (of course) and dives in to help. He rescues them and even rescues Ian’s precious cheese (don’t ask). Ian is predictably weird about the whole thing. Susan gets annoyed and tells him that the next time he freaks out about Mike, it’s over between them. Well, then she drops off a thank you gift to Mike and for whatever reason, Mike kisses her and that gets her thinking. So now she’s torn between the two men. Again. Niiiice.

Oh, the best moment of the night goes to Mrs. McC, who it turns out is keeping her dead husband in her deep freeze. For reals!